Zombie Mom

I haven't slept in days. We traveled to Indiana to visit my parents this weekend and it's totally thrown me off. I never get a good nights sleep when I sleep somewhere other than my bed so I didn't sleep well on my visit. Lack of sleep, paired with the stress of traveling and being away from home with my baby, has taken to my knees today.

Jordan and I have a deal that I get up with Madilynn during the week and he gets up with her on the weekends. I get our bedroom to myself to catch up on sleep. One might think that this would be a tremendous help but it's really not. I still have to get up to pump which takes almost an hour. By then I'm almost fully awake and it's really hard to get back to sleep. And now Madilynn isn't taking a bottle. So last night Jordan was waking me up to feed the baby.

Everyone says, "Sleep when the baby sleeps." This is hard for me to do because I can't really nap during the day. I need to sleep in dark and quiet. And I use Madilynn's naps to get things done around the house. I can't fall asleep while thinking about all the chores that need to be done.

Do to the lack of sleep and the stress of everything I feel like I need to get done, I'm at my wits end. My temper is super short and my patience is shorter. I'm snappy and irritable. I find myself getting angry at my husband because it's so easy for him to sleep and nap.

I want to sleep. Just to sleep without having to wake up, or being woken up, for as long as I can. And then just 2 more hours.